Not so serious

Mark Lutz harassment calls remix

A reader sent me this funny sound clip. Enjoy!
(Mark Lutz is a Prenda Law employee responsible for harassment calls.)

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53 responses to ‘Mark Lutz harassment calls remix

  1. This track is my new drinking game, he averages about six “ahh or umm” during each call. Which is hilarious since each call is about 20 seconds.

    I am pretty sure there is a recording of Capt. Hubris somewhere, maybe in one of the ARS articles.

    Keep winning Johnny….

    • If you want to get really drunk (i.e. Steeled) take a drink every time he utters either “settle” or “settlement”. Kinda reminds me of ambulance chasers… .

  2. That is one ugly troll! Are those the eyes of Satin I see? I would bet you could pick up an STD from hanging out in those places touching poles and other things. I hope he is not a role model for other less experienced attorneys or a child.

      • Yes, according to the Pacer # provided by David Donoghue, this is the case. Meanwhile Pacer search indicates that the case is closed back in September. I cannot refresh the docket since ILND Pacer is currently down…

        I asked the author on Twitter about it, waiting for a response….

        BTW, there is an interesting motion for sanctions there. It’s not clear what happened after…

        • Shemale Cuties Who Love It Up Their Booties?!!?

          No, I did not make that up. This kind of shit simply cannot be made up. Yes, it was so much fun typing that particular title that I had to capitalize each and every luscious word.

          And not just Shemale Cuties Who Love It Up Their Booties … but BUDDY WOOD’S Shemale Cuties Who Love It Up Their Booties. And no, I did not use caps lock just now – I used my poor, beleaguered shift key to personally capitalize each and every wondrous letter individually.

          Seriously – fraud or no fraud – John Steele should get sanctioned for just starting a case that had a remote chance of possibly mentioning Buddy Wood’s Shemale Cuties Who Love It Up Their Booties. How many federal judges can say that they’ve ever felt the threat of having to speak the words of their legal documents aloud? Do you think that Judge Manning occasionally takes these things to the break room, breathlessly saying “guys … guys … you GOTTA check this shit out! It’s freakin HILARIOUS!”

          BuDdY WoOd’S ShEmAlE CuTiEs WhO LoVe IT UP ThEiR BoOtIeS!

        • And yes. I had so much fun typing that that yes, I DID give my own post a “thumbs-up”! I realize that liking your own posts is tantamount to masturbation … but …

          I love Buddy Wood’s Shemale Cuties!

          and Buddy Wood’s Shemale Cuties like it where?!?

    • I am, but I’m not in California. Lutz has been calling me and Joe Perea is sending me letters, trying to get me to settle for a case that’s been dismissed. “Our client has generously extended the settlement deadline to (insert date here).” OK dickhead, so I’m gonna pay you money for…? A case that has been dismissed? Go ahead, keep calling. You’ll keep getting my voicemail, Markie Poo. Lutz: “Uhhh duhhh we got some extra help so we’re gonna go ahead and uhhh proceed with the uhhh process of blah blah in the FEDERAL (oooOooOO scary) copyright infringement lawsuit that you’re a part of (that doesn’t exist because Paul Duffy dismissed it and that we won’t claim that you’re a part of if you try to sue us) so we’re gonna send some time sensitive yada yada get a lawyer blah blah.”

      • If these guys were not seriously messing with so many people’s lives this would be hilarious. It is kind of like watching the Three Stooges impersonate Hitler and Mussolini, funny but dark at the same time.

        • I have to agree with that, but it’s still hilarious (yet disturbing for obvious reasons) that Lutz managed to get a college degree and Perea has a law degree. Every time I genuinely miss a call from Lutz (or just ignore him) and hit “play” on my machine, I laugh my ass off because it’s almost the same exact thing every time. “We have more attorneys,” “you will receive time sensitive paperwork,” “we’ve got some more help,” “I’m calling about the federal copyright infringement lawsuit that you’re a part of,” and the list goes on. Hell, I’m wearing a grin right now as I type this.

          Then Perea called me and he sounded like a bigger moron. No joke, he began the message with: “Uh hi (insert name here), this is, uhhh, Joe (last name not provided but I took a wild ass guess), from Prenda Law….(insert script here).” It sounded as if he was scared to be leaving a voicemail.

          • BTW Perea is very “green”, just 4 years after getting the license. Pity that he made such a terrible choice in the beginning of his carrier: he thinks that life is long and all the high mountains await him. Wrong. A virtual tattoo “Troll” is next to impossible to remove: it will be too late when/if he realizes that.

    • Yep. Got a call from Mark Lutz himself today. Same numbers. Called from 213-344-5671 but wanted a call back to 305-748-2102. I imagine the call back number is some sort of system that records telephone conversations for their ‘use’.

        • Ha that assumes Lutz cares about the law…which he doesn’t, as evidenced by the harrassing phone calls he makes to people who have been dismissed WITH prejudice. Hell, he called me twice in two days. Today and yesterday to tell me that they’re gonna go forward with the “copyright infringement lawsuit that (I’m) a part of” (the entire action was dismissed in January). He is beyond stupid. I’m just waiting for another Perea letter. “We’re gonna name you” followed by “we’re really gonna do it” followed by “ok this time we’re gonna do it we have more lawyers” followed by more and more threats. Rinse, wash, repeat. Same script.

          Name me, assholes. Oh wait, that would require you to produce evidence, which you don’t have, and would also open up the production company and likely your firm to counter-action. Never mind that one. Continue with the harassment and you’ll hear from my attorney who will promptly tell you to fuck off (in a properly worded cease and desist letter).

  3. Thought everyone might like this little gem that just came out yesterday:


    APR 12 2012

    Case called for hearing on pending motions to quash subpoenas: parties present through counsel, arguments heard IT IS THEREFORE ORDERED:
    1) All pending motions to quash subpoenas filed by the ISPs are Denied.
    2) All ISPs shall comply with plaintiffs outstanding subpoenas (consistent with the court’s order entered 12/16/11) as follows: ISPs shall issue any required statutory notice of this order to their subscribers and shall produce all client subscriber identifying information (including but not limited to name and address) on or before 6/12/12. (By agreement of plaintiff and Comcast, Comcast to produce 80% of its compliance on or before said date with final compliance to be completed by 6/26/12.)
    3) The 18Ps shall provide the following notice in substantially the following form to their subscribers:
    “we have been ordered to provide your identifying information to Prenda Law pursuant to a court order dated April 12,2012 in the case Lightspeed Media Corp. vs. John Doe, case number l1-L-683 in 81. Clair County, Illinois. The court has ordered that any motions filed relating to this order will be heard on July 20, 2012 at 10:00am. No other dates will be set to hear any motions relating to compliance with outstanding subpoenas. All Non-Attorneys are prohibited from directly contacting the court in any manner other than in writing.”
    4) In the event one or more ISP subscribers file a motion of any kind relating to the release of their private information, that ISP shall delay production with respect to the moving subscribers only and shall not delay the release of the information of any other subscribers.
    5) All pleadings objecting to the release of information must list the IP address associated with the person objecting. The ISP that has the subscribers information shall preserve all information until the court rules on the objecting motion.

    Let me summarize it for those of you who are not used to using more than one brain cell, or one hand, at a time: The Master Troll came out from under his bridge and taught Comcast, Verizon, ATT, BellSouth, WayPort, Qwest, Cox, CenturyTel, Embarq some law! (After typing all those ISP names, I know what your right hands must feel like!). So for the 6500 pirates (that number is not a typo) in this case who were gloating that your ISP’s were protecting your crimes, get ready. There are some eager people that have been waiting for this day for some time. I know what your thinking, most of the crap written on this site is not true, how do I know this is accurate? Here is how you can tell. In the next ten days, a little bird has told me that the first 100 individual cases against NAMED defendants will be filed and placed on If it is not, you will all know the Master Troll is full of ^*(%(&#. If you see your name in lights (or the names of 100 of your pirating buddies), maybe, just maybe, they are really are coming after you thieving criminals.

    PS. Yes, Steele was drinking a Bud light at his wedding, OMG!!! Smoking Gun!

    • Big deal John. Talk Talk Talk. Zero Zero Zero. We have all dealt with the various courts eventually releasing subscriber information, especially in the jurisdictions friendly to you. Funny how you can claim the 6500 pirates are not a typo, but your firm can’t get the correct number of cases you have filed and NEVER served a single defendant into a court document in CA. Wow, you are going to name people and put them on your Web site. Please, go ahead and make it easier for the people who actually file counterclaims against your Plaintiff. Can’t wait to see how your two CA cases turn out. Bottom line Master Troll – your evidence (public IP address) is weak and you know it. You will no doubt get some people to settle, that is the nature of this game. Be warned as you try to be more forceful, more lawyer on the other side will see a chance to take your Plaintiff for everything they have. Can’t wait to see your technical experts get tore up.
      DTD 🙂

    • Usually when you come bragging in these forums “your” also bragging about the kind of beer “your” drinking. Kerry Steele so easy she support permissive joinder!

    • Pretty much, yes. Which is funny to see Steve “Lightspeed” Jones brag about it on the GFY forums. What dipshits they are.

  4. “In the next ten days, a little bird has told me that the first 100 individual cases against NAMED defendants will be filed and placed on”

    A little bird tells me In the eleven days you will have several more lawsuits with you as the defendant.

    • After the flashlight effect that Pirate Hunter’s unprofessional and juvenile behavior has had on neutralizing any “shock and awe” effect of the massive trolling campaign; I am surprised Steve Jones is not with another Troll like Lipscomb who I think is much more effective with the bottom line for his clients (i.e. not a funny/malicious Troll but one that is truly despicable and is working his way to Hell). IMHO.

  5. I just listened to one of the messages Lutz left for me on Tuesday (I’ve been on an engagement for the past 2 weeks). He went off script. “…we’ve sent you numerous letters that you’ve pretty much ignored…” Good for you, Mark. You finally figured out that, in my humble opinion, you’re part of a bottom feeding extortion scam on a grand scale that’s gonna collapse. Hopefully ending in federal prison sentences. Then he threatened (again) to name me…he’s been threatening to name me since last October so, as anyone can figure out, I don’t really take him seriously in any way whatsoever.

    • Hmmm.. I have not heard from Lutz since January. I was in a dismissed California case, but that’s seemed to stop others from receiving calls.

      • He’s been harassing the shit outta me for the past couple months, post-dismissal of course. Joe Perea sends me letters, offering to “let me” settle. Settle what? There is no case anymore. The entire action was dismissed. First of all, since there is no case, I’d just be paying them. Second of all, they can go to hell because I’d never pay them.

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